One of multiples

So my last post was about the cost of having more than 1 child. My husband and I want more, but we're not sure we can afford it and at my age (I'm 38), we're not sure we can wait and try later either.

I'm torn. If we decide to stop at one, we can give Michael more, take him more places and do more things. On the other hand, my mom was an only child, and has wanted all her life to have a sibling. I have a sister and can't imagine being an only child. When our dad passed away suddenly, we depended on each other a lot. We constantly called and just cried together trying to get through it.

Earlier this year, our mom had some major health problems and spent almost 5 months in the hospital. One Friday night, my sister and I got a call from the doctors saying she wasn't doing well and we needed to come immediately (a lot easier said than done when you live 3 hours away). Once again, I don't know what I would have done without my sister. I love my husband dearly, but it's not the same. My sister and I have a bond that can never be broken. We may get upset with each other, fight, scream, whatever, but we'll always be sisters no matter what. I really want my son to have that.

My husband is one of three and just like me, he knows he can always count on his brother and sister no matter what happens.

That's about it for now. Our stove was one the fritz and so I had to take the day off to wait for the repair guy...now it's time to get my miracle baby and spend the rest of the day with him.

The Climb

Many of you may have been like me at one time. You had grandiose visions of sitting in the corner office overlooking the little people below while taking home your mammoth paycheck. Hordes would scramble to your office desparate for your answer to life-changing, world-defining questions.

Then, one day...YOU WOKE UP or like me you had a baby. Those dirty diapers and midnight wake-up calls changed it all. Now, your grandiose visions are of taking a day off to play with your little miracle baby. Then again, your vision may be a bit blurred by the flying food or toys being hurled past your head without warning.

My grandiose visions now are of promotions with enough pay increases to be able to have more kids - daycare isn't cheap, you know... I want at least 1 more. Then again, at my age, we might have trouble getting pregnant at all or at the other end of the spectrum, we could end up with multiples... then I better really get a big raise...

I was thinking about this just this morning as realized, 2 kids in daycare would run us $1000 a month. That's almost a mortgage payment...and my mother-in-law wonders why I'm not pregnant again yet. Of course, that doesn't count the formula, diapers, clothes, etc. We're saving all Michael's "stuff" just in case, but with the costs involved, we're not sure we can afford to have more kids.

Co-sleeping problems

My adorable 27 month old boy has taken to sleeping with my husband/his father and I. At first, I wrote it off to being in a new place (we bought a house last Dec), but 8 months later, I'm out of excuses and nothing we've tried works. Until we moved from the apt, we put Michael to bed every night by himself and he drifted off to sleep and was fine. Now, if we put him to bed still awake, he screams until we finally give in and hold him until he falls asleep. Then, we put him in his bed only to be awakened in the middle of the night when he wakes up and cries until we put him in the bed with us. At first, we tried letting him cry himself back to sleep, but my husband and I both work and have to get up at 5 am. It's a little hard to do our jobs if we're falling asleep at our desks.

My mom is coming to visit for a month and I'm hoping she has some suggestions, but I'm open to suggestions from anyone. My back would thank you as well since I now seem to wake up with a backache every day.

Grandma visiting

My mom is finally getting to come visit for about a month and I can't be more excited. She spent several months in the hospital after having a brain tumor removed and had a really hard time. We even almost lost her a couple of times. Now she's home and is doing much better and is even feeling up to traveling. My husband and I bought our house in Dec and so far she's only seen pics of it, but next month, after my niece's baptism, mom is coming home with us and staying.

The best part is our son getting to spend so much time with her. Every time we visit I feel bad, because it takes him several hours to get used to and comfortble with her and even then she doesn't get to see his real personality. I think this will be great for both of them. She'll get to see him in his usual environment and he'll get to spend plenty of time with her so even after she goes home, when we visit, he'll be comfortable.

The only drawback is that since she hasn't seen the house yet, I want everything to be perfect and that means quite a bit of work in the next few weeks to get everything done before she gets here. Get that hammer ready honey...

Pop tart toddler, etc...

For the last month, our 2 yr old has asked for and eaten nothing but POPTARTS!!! I'm sick of looking at them and it worries me that my sweet baby is not eating better. Of course, it's our fault because we haven't forced the issue until now. So what did my husband and I do? We distracted him and hid the box. He still asks for them, but we show him the empty space (yes, I'm so anal even poptarts have their own spot in the cabinet) and he's fine. Of course, now we're dealing with only wanting a PB sandwich for every meal. And you know what's really frustrating is that at daycare, he eats whatever they put in front of him. Why??? Because he knows he doesn't have a choice there. At home, he knows I don't want him to go hungry and so I'll fix him something else if he doesn't eat dinner. He eats for grandma and daycare and I can fix the same thing they do and he won't eat it. What's with that??? So my mom's coming to visit. She'll get here about the middle of Sept and will be here for a month. Maybe some of you don't understand, but I'm thrilled. My mom had a brain tumor removed in Feb. Although it was not cancerous, it was causing a lot of health problems. She also had a lot of complications...so much so that we almost lost her a couple of times. One Fri night, we got a call from the hospital telling us how bad she was and that we needed to come immediately. Not easy when you're 3 hours away. For my sister and BIL even harder. They're 4 hours, 1 infant and a dog away. At least we only had to worry about our 2 year old and he traveled REALLY well. What made it even worse was that 4 years ago, our dad laid down to take a nap and never woke up. He was only 57 so now I'm paranoid about my mom. We have a small family to start with. It's me, my sister, my grandmother (mom's side), my uncle (dad's bro), aunt (dad's bro's wife) and cousin (who we've only seen once in the last 10 years and that was for my dad's mom's funeral.

Ooops, my sweet one is awake from his nap... so this will have to wait. I'll be traveling soon and I should be able to get this updated then.

Shipping off my baby - part 2

We all survived the trip to great grand-parents. I guess I should say, they (my-inlaws) survived it and my hubby and I just endured our son being gone for 8 days. It wasn't as bad for me because I was on travel for work. But my poor husband was all by himself for 8 days. It definitely gave him plenty of time to study, but I don't think he enjoyed the house being so quite. Since Michael got home, he hasn't wanted to let us out of his sight for anything. The last few mornings when I drop him off at daycare, he wraps his arms and legs around me so tight it actually hurts. Then he really breaks my heart. He cries and screams for me not to leave him. You'd think he was being beaten. Yesterday, it was so bad, I almost called in and told my boss I was taking the day off. Then I decided that wasn't teaching Michael anything except how to control me so I sucked it up, left him with this friends and teachers at daycare and got myself to work. I just keep reminding myself, this is just the tip of the iceberg and it will only get harder as he gets older.